When One of Us Leaves

On Female Friendship, Grief, and the Power of Our Circles

There is a particular kind of magic in female friendship. It’s not the curated kind, not just brunches or selfies with matching mugs. It’s the deep, gut-level, soul-resonant kind. The kind that changes your timeline. The kind that says: I see you. I remember who you are, especially when you forget.

And today, I want to honour one of the women who did exactly that for me.

Her name was Elizabeth Lembke.

She was radiant. Fierce. Absolutely fabulous. She turned up like every day was an invitation to play, to remind you that leadership could look like a crown and a sparkly cape. Fancy dress? Silly hats? She didn’t need an excuse. It was her language. Her joy. Her magic. And she shared that joy so generously.

Elizabeth didn’t just support women, she uplifted, celebrated, empowered, and ignited them. As part of the L&D Cares conference, she co-created a space called the Empowerment League. And when she invited me in, I had no idea that it would become the birthplace of one of the most important pieces of my life’s work: Good Girl Deprogramming.

That circle of brilliant, bold, rebellious women cracked something open in me. It gave me the container, the cheerleaders, and the fire to begin. And Elizabeth was with me every step of the way.

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The Sacred System of Sisterhood

I’ve long said no one heals alone. And no one becomes who they are meant to be alone, either.

We need our women, not just to nod along or validate us. We need them to witness us. To see through the masks. To speak truth to our potential. To hold us when we’re breaking and remind us we’re still whole.

Elizabeth did that for me.

She wasn’t just an ally. She was a trickster-muse-meets-soul-guide. She brought play into everything. She held space and lit it up at the same time.

During the pandemic, when everything felt untethered, her Kaffeeklatsch sessions kept me sane. Zooms filled with laughter, wild ideas, authenticity, and new friends from around the world. She made sure no one was alone. She built bridges across borders and timelines. She made connection feel like a kind of activism.

She was so flipping wise. Not in a loud or showy way, but in that grounded, brilliant, quietly-blow-your-mind kind of way. Elizabeth had this uncanny ability to see the deeper pattern, whether in people, systems, or ideas, and name it with clarity and compassion. She could connect dots no one else saw, and then explain it back to you in a way that made everything click into place. Her insights landed like truth-arrows: sharp, kind, unforgettable. Conversations with her weren’t just enriching—they were transformative. She didn’t just “get it”, she got you. And made you feel wiser just for being in the room with her.

And still, one of my deepest regrets is that I never got to meet her in person. I always thought we had time. We spoke of it, planned around it, assumed the future would make room. But time, it seems, had other plans. And that ache, that not yet, sits heavy in my heart.

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When One of Us Leaves

When a woman like Elizabeth leaves the earth, the system feels it. It’s not just personal, it’s elemental. A shifting in the energetic field. A lantern going out. A dimming of light.

Because those of us who remain, we carry her now. We become the continuation. The spell that still casts. The laughter that still echoes. The rose that blooms where she once stood.

So I ask you, right now, to do what I’m doing:

Honour your women.

Love them out loud.

Tell them they matter before they’re gone.

Plant something for them. Send the voice note. Choose the sparkly earrings because you can. Let your friendships be devotional.

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This Is Sacred Work

Female friendship is not an accessory. It is a power source. A structural necessity. It is ancestral, radical, and magical.

When we are deeply connected, we don’t just survive, we rise. We become mirrors, portals, and protectors for each other. We remember who we are. And we become who we were always meant to be.

Elizabeth did that.

For me.

For so many.

And her legacy lives in every person she empowered, celebrated, and put on her Maleficent horns for.

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To Elizabeth.

Female friendship is not frivolous. It is not a side-dish to romantic love. It is not a luxury. It is holy. It is structural. It is systemically radical.

Because when women are deeply connected, when we see and support each other, we become unstoppable. We build worlds. We change lineages. We rise, not above each other, but with each other.

Just like Elizabeth did.

To the Empowerment League.

To every woman who has midwifed another woman’s becoming.

To Elizabeth. You were fricken marvellous. You are missed. Your magic lives on in us.

I love you. Always.